COUNTRY CLUB DUES AND DON'TS

Did you get a chance to read Hector Tobar's column in the Times this morning? Give a click to the link and you'll find one of those dirty-little-secret exposés that you just can't believe someone didn't write about thirty years ago.

Tobar, who got his story from a small, downtown rag - the Los Angeles Garment and Citizen (oy!) - reports that private country clubs in Los Angeles - Bel Air, Brentwood, Hillcrest, etc. - pay only a fraction of the real estate taxes one would expect. That's because the land on which they and their golf courses stand has been assessed at a fraction of its real value ... a very small fraction, a miniscule fraction, a single-digit fraction. As an example, the Bel Air Country Club had an assessed land value last year of $5.7 million. That's not per acre, that's for the entire 120 acres.

You know, I don't mind a little fraud now and then; it shows that people care enough about having a good time to cheat. And if rich people want to go to luxurious clubs, attended to by deferential servants with unending smiles, what's it to me? Hey, I played golf at Hillcrest last week - had a fabulous time. But let's be at least marginally realistic about that real estate value. I mean ... $5.7 million? Are you kidding? The valet parking franchise is worth that much.

Rich guys are always saying, "There's no such thing as a free lunch." Apparently that applies to Factor's, but not to the clubhouse buffet. Come on, boys. Pony up!