Travel Plans

When all the smoke clears, yesterday's news story about the “discovery” of an al Queda plot to blow up nine jetliners using liquid explosives might have a bumpy flight. I’m not saying it’s a lie, per se, but it’s a mighty convenient time for such a unifying threat to suddenly surface, what with Lieberman losing, the war news being so bad, and the president’s number being in the crapper and all. It sounds a little bush league to me.

As a result of the London arrests, travelers are backed up at airports from Heathrow to O'Hare, banned from carrying any liquids in carry-on luggage: drinks, shampoo, make-up, nada! Bottled breast milk will be tested . . . by breast owners.

In Los Angeles, Mayor Villaraigosa said, in a very authoratative voice, that shoe removal at security check points was no longer optional. Gees, I never got the impression that it was. Airport security always seemed to say, “Take off your shoes or take the bus.” Not much of an option, if you ask me. And what if the next bomber we catch, instead of putting a bomb in his shoe, makes a shoe into an actual bomb. Does that mean we will all have to fly shoeless from now on? Will we eventually be flying naked? Would we have to pay extra for that?

Putting the B in Bush League, the mayor also mentioned that Los Angeles would maintain a high level of “vigilism.” I’m pretty sure he meant vigilance, but you never know. He might even have meant vigilanteism - hard to tell. But it does seem to me if a man campaigns to take control of the L. A. U. S. D. he should probably bone up on his grammar.

One foot on either side.

1 XCZR